Sunday, March 13, 2016

Another Year Older

Today is my birthday. At 9:40 pm I officially turned 33! So glad to be able to celebrate today with my favorite people, Mike, Levi, and my parents(not pictured). As far as birthdays go it was a good day. And there was yummy fruit pizza so I was happy!

I'm still a little sad that my little man is sick. You always know he's not feeling well when he falls asleep in the car - which is exactly what he did on our way to the way to the cemetery to visit Abby's grave(it was a special time for Mike and I). And I'm hoping he feels better soon!

I don't know what God has for store for me(and my family) over the course of the next year but I pray that I embrace it and accept whatever it is with grace and willing heart to follow His will. My wants and desires don't always fall into God's time table and I need to learn to accept that. A friend of ours ended a email that was an update about his cancer journey with this: God is good. In all things. All the time. And I do believe that with all my heart!

Throwback to my 1st birthday when life was easy!!

My love and I!! <3

May be a little weird but going to visit Abby's grave was one of the best parts of my day. She would have been two months old today and we hadn't been able to make it out since she was buried. The heart wreath from her graveside service was laying there so we removed the dead flowers and sunk it into the ground behind her grave. I knew that her Uncle Nathan(who was stillborn) was already laid to rest in the grave beside her but I started crying as I realized that she was surrounded by several other infants and young children. My heart broke for the other parents that have walked this journey before us. My heart breaks for the parents who will walk this journey after us. Those last few days of her life were the hardest days ever. Days I never wish to go back and repeat but I will be forever thankful for the 15 short days we able to hold Abby in our arms. 

Happy two month birthday my little angel! We love you and miss you! 

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